falling endlessly

.breathe.

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 04:06:28 GMT

It's Friday! (Almost)... I'm interested to see how far I can get tomorrow, going only on just enough brain power to stay awake... Hmm...

Glee~

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 03:25:59 GMT

Rofl, I watch Glee after 2 weeks of freaking baseball instead, and I totally Glee-pimp my entire page.

From Bleach to Glee... <3 And I love it. <3

Oh, how I've missed it so much... <3 Though, unfortunate as it is, I think I would've enjoyed the episode more if I wasn't so busy thinking about homework, school, sleep, making sets/color shizz, and writing... Oh how I want to write... But I have no time for myself. Now that I think about it, a lot of what I've been occupied with lately, is for other people. Homework for teachers, etc... I'm not even sure I feel like sleep is on my side. Meh... Only two days till the weekend... And even then, I have a feeling it'll feel like a "short" weekend again, and I won't really get anything accomplished, despite what I've actually done. (You'd better not steal my weekend again, Madelyn! ;]) (Just a few weeks till Thanksgiving break... Just a bit longer...)

And on an interesting note, Kurt's version of Defying Gravity is making me smile, and feel much better. (I really should watch Wicked...)

*heavy sigh* Can I turn down the world now? Seriously... Now I'm just ready to lock myself in my room, and refuse to go to school.

Phooey.

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:14:01 GMT

Why is it when I actually want to post something, I can never think of anything decent to post?? *facepalm* And I usually end up talking about my day... Which I'm going to do now!

I'm getting so freaking pissed at time traveling.

No joke.

-First we read Kindred in english. No biggie. Good story. Depressing slave fiction story, but good nonetheless. Guess what? Has time traveling.
-Watched 17 Again on Saturday with mom. Okay, has some time jumps, so it's not necessarily time traveling, but it's dealing with time. Cool story, bro.
-Then I dream about time traveling, which really sets me off, because being so confused about my dream made me angrier today, along with the crappy night's sleep.

I so dreamed I went to the future, with my dad, brother, and two cats. (Which is PLENTY hard when you're flying along on a carpet, over a sea of submersed land. Yeah, you read that right.) Here apparently in the future, everything flooded over for some reason, and it was really bad. But how was I to get back to my real time?

Go down a plastic kiddie slide!
So I went down the slide with Pepper, the 15 pound cat, who's struggling to get out of my grasp, and find that I was still in the future. I just only met my future son, who was dancing in sweats and a wifebeater. Let me note he was a horrible dancer. And ended up kissing me. (Sure, he was hot, but future son?? WTF.) And then I woke up. Great story, huh? I totally swore at my alarm, cuz I was so freaking tired, and confused as hell at my dream. It was worse than the one with Allison a week ago... Oh, you want to hear that one too? Okay!

I was in jail for some reason or another, and I was with another person(who suspiciously looked like the woman on the cover of Kindred), but they let me out for the day. It was nice and sunny, so it was cool, right? Not. I went swimming with Allison and some other friend, but Allison lost her swimming suit top(dunno how that happened), so I went to go get it for her, but failed miserably. (*snorts* Reminds me of the time Mandy lost her swim trunks at the lake, though I'm not sure what's worse! XD)

I drowned.
*sarcasm* Best part? Josh came and saved me. I can't remember it happening in my dream, but he did CPR on me... Awkward?

Very. XD But seriously, I've been having these eff'd up dreams for the last week! I blame it on poor sleep from the last few days. XD (But can I seriously stop dreaming about random crap, and have some fun fluffy(or angsty) Bleach dreams? I want my fandom 24/7. Not just when I can squeeze it into extra work time in classes.)

Anywho, I should stop before I start rambling on too much... I need to try to get some decent sleep before I wake up swearing and jittery again. Until next time, my peeps! (I hope I can present to you some more cracked up dreams about the randomest stuff, soon. <3)

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 15:42:53 GMT

I just started using a mini-ouji board thing(though it has to deal with pendulums instead of a plastic piece).

And it's freaking me out. D8 It's working!!!

6HBA1~ <3

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 14:24:12 GMT

I can officially say that I've caught up on almost 2 weeks worth of missed homework. In 1 week... (Gah, I'm so proud of myself. XD) Now I only need to make up a few more tests/quizes, and start doing homework that I've been getting now.

Other than school related stuff, my weekend's actually been pretty good. <3 I spent most of Saturday with my mom, and we ate Taco Bell and watched 17 Again (which was actually really good. I'm going to watch it again today with my dad, lol.) I also kicked butt with other stuff that I needed/wanted to get done, computer-wise... So I was excited. <3 Here's one of the things I got accomplished!

Oh lawdy, those eyes... *-* And the blood! So much blood! XD Blah, so my goal today is to clean up my room(which is filled with clothes and other things that need to be put away), and maybe try to get some other stuff done, on the internet... I know I wanted to rewrite all my drabbles. XD And that's over 25 of them... I think... Yeah, we'll see... (If only the weekends held more time. </3)

XD

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 23:00:53 GMT

http://www.221b.sh/account

Emily's camel face makes for a good Sherlock Holmes.

Danke schon to Kelsey for the awesome link~ (I can't wait for the movie to come out!)

Wow.

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 20:38:28 GMT

I was pissed yesterday... Whoops. XD

Zomg, new Diamond In The Rough chapter is up, as I type this!! *goes off to read*

Ahem, anyways... Lots of homework to be done, so little time to do it... At least I'm feeling kinda better. Meh... :> P.S. New Bleach chapter was cool but there's no Hime in it, so it makes it kind of fail... -_- Gimme my angsty princess back! T^T

Am I allowed to shed a few tears now?

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 21:06:46 GMT

I don't give a crap if anyone reads this... I just need to vent... Or cry.... Possibly both... T^T Still fucking sick, and I KNOW I have to go back to school, I've missed so much... I KNOW THAT. Out of all the people in the world, I should know that the most.

But go ahead, send more people to my face, telling me I NEED to go back. I can't afford to miss more school. Dammit, I know that! Don't give me a lecture on how school is important and that I need to get better, especially when I'm in a lot of pain... Trust me, if I could control my Killer T cells and crap, I would, and I'd already be over this stupid bug or whatever. But I can't so I have to wait it out like normal viruses are.

I hate lectures. My mom understands this crap I'm going through, cuz she had the same thing. But can't my dad understand that I can't go cuz my stomach really hurts, among other things? It's like... Hey, you're dying.... Go to school....
Okay, maybe not that drastic, I don't want to go to school if I'm just going to pass out from fatigue or curl into the fetal position cuz my stomach cramps are so bad.

Crap... Okay, I'm done. Rant over, my apologies...

Crap...

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:22:06 GMT

Still sick. D: Oh nooooes. *cries* Stupid germs. T^T I'm really only posting this cuz I'm bored... And I just uploaded a bunch of new icons, soo... >_> Yeah... And I only picked restless as my mood, cuz both the Sick and Nauseous moods are insanely gross looking. XD

(P.S. Glee = Epic winz... 8D)

Chapter 388

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 23:15:10 GMT

Yes, I'm posting a freaking post about a Bleach chapter. T^T Don't hate meeeee!!

Zomg... TOTAL IchiHime moment in the manga, and she wasn't even there!! XDDDD She was mentioned, and he got an amazing look in his eyes after she was mentioned... And forget Rukia saying stuff about, "Those were the eyes of someone that was defeated..." WRONG. >8] Those eyes were screaming out at the mention of her~ *dances, then gets dizzy again* Whoops, anyways... Yeah. 8D Good chapter... I got to see lots of Ichigo abs, so my fangirl was plenty happy. XD

On a more negative note, I slept for like, 12 freaking hours last night, was fine for most of the morning, but I got really, really dizzy for about an hour, and tried to ignore it(which is hard to do, let me tell you), and so I tried to take a nap, which didn't help any... It just made me feel like I had a fever. XD Boy, life is graaand. And I'm supposed to have the day off to have fun? Yeah right... So much for trying to get stuff done today. XD My brain was too busy spinning on it's inner merry-go-round. Whatever... I'm just going to go pass out again, woot.

P.S. A double (and now belated) happy birthday to BB-chuuuuu~ XD How exciting!! (Now that I think about it... Isn't Aaron Dimuske(?) another year older now too? XD Oh well...)

I leave my heart with my friends

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 00:22:52 GMT

Just because I haven't posted in a few days, and yes, I know there's still ning. DX YOU CAN'T STOP ME FROM USING LJ. I WILL REBEL!!
Besides school starting and fangirling over my fandom, I made finished this fanart yesterday. It was an ass to do, because anatomy got stupid, coloring got stupid, and it was just plain stupid. I wanted to throw it away... But the end result turned out good, so I guess it was kind of worth it? If I'd change anything, I'd clean it up a bit, because the lineart is really messy, lol.

Well, enough chitter-chatter, here it is.

Her arm is a wicked length too... So long, it's like, STREEEEETCH. 8D Anywho, I dun care if you didn't want to see it, I like how it turned out, despite how big of a bitch it was being. Well, bai bai. :3

DONE

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 01:25:54 GMT

Well, I did finish that picture. *evil grin* It turned out pretty good, if I do say so myself. Now people on that Bleach forum are suggesting I draw this girl:

In skimpy outfits for holidays like Christmas, or the other guys' birthday. XD Which wouldn't be a bad idea, since one of the people told me that I should work on drawing boobs. It's not a bad idea, but I don't want to be labeled a perv for drawing girls in skimpy outfits.
Though I suppose the below is already the starting point of my perverted art anyway.

Anywho, this was the finished product, in all it's hand-cuffed goodness.

Whoop-de-flippin'-do.

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 00:51:59 GMT

I never realized how much Ichigo icons I have saved for LJ. *headdesk* I need to even that out or something...

I want to rant, but I dunno about anything significant, sooooooo. Here's what I decided.

Anyway, Bleach abs are magnificent to look at, but they are HELL to draw. D: And you're probably asking, "Courtney, why are you drawing such an... Interesting picture?" Well, basically it's one of the character's birthdays, and so I'm drawing this... For her. xD (She's in love with this guy, so why not give her a semi-nekkid picture of the guy? D: )

Got any tips/suggestions/things that need a fixin'?

Rawrz, can't think of anything else to say, besides that I have a tummyache... D: Oh well.

Wed, 06 May 2009 22:48:02 GMT

I only wish is to have communication.
I try to talk, but nothing meaningful ever comes out. It's almost as if I say nothing at all.
I am not smart, and I cannot have deep, meaningful conversations with them.
I wish to talk to them more
BUT
I do not want to hinder them in any way.
I do not want to be the cause of any negative happening later, just because I distract them from their work.
I have a wish.
But it burdens others...

And when it burdens others, it burdens me...
And I feel the weight of loneliness pushing, shoving me into the ground
until I cry, understand, and walk away alone.

>_>

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:04:48 GMT

Everyday I wonder what will be of my life.
What I will be, and who I will meet.
How I will fall in love, and when I will fall into despair.
Life.
Death.
Where is my place in the world? Surely we all have one.
If we don't then there is no meaning.
Why? Why must it be me to be uninformed about this?

Who, what, where, when and why. These are the questions that drive us to insanity.

I wish there will come a day where someone can say, "I love you," and mean it with all their heart.
I wish there will come a day where someone will hug me tight, and pat my head while telling me, "It'll be alright," and mean it.
I wish there will come a day where someone is persistant to not let go, through the toughest times, saying, "I will never let you go," and mean it.
I wish there will be a person to stay by my side, and do all these things. I believe these are the things that keep us alive, because being alone will make a person shatter like glass.

(I wrote these off the top of my head... Sorry for the emo-ness of it. *runs to post it on facebook as well*)

OMG Pics.

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 14:51:29 GMT

Pics from Anime Detour 2009. For multiple parties, I've uploaded it to both photobucket AND megaupload(WOW). View them if you're interested, and avoid them if you don't.

http://s84.photobucket.com/albums/k34/Da

rk_Angel_Of_Light/Anime%20Detour%2009/

Guest Password: mellojello

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=UWUZCKDK

Other info:
The many pictures of Fullmetal Alchemist and D. Gray Man are from photoshoots across the street from the hotel. Rebecca took the pictures for the D. Gray Man photoshoot, and I took pictures for the FMA one.

The video with the funky lighting is from Opening Ceremony.

And YES, we did go to a Disney panel, and YES, Alice is a guy.
Some pictures were taken in Diana's room, during the Cosplay and AMV Competition. There was gossip in the bathroom that there wasn't enough room, so she kindly let us watch the show in her room.

My favorite picture: 8D dun, dun duuuun.... Twincest!!! Kaoru and Hikaru!!! <3

Hi!

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 23:10:30 GMT

How are you? (Yes, you, Bailey/Tina/Nick/Tama/Allison/Anyone else who reads this). How was your day?

Quotes

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 01:36:56 GMT

When you search for "depressing quotes" on google, you get some good results. But why is it that when you read them, it's oddly inspirational, along with the obvious depressing feeling that you get?... :c

Just an interesting thought...

Friday!

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 01:27:50 GMT

Woooooot, it's Friday!!

P.S. I'm still jealous of Bailey. 8D

Halp~!~

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 15:54:10 GMT

I can't decide, so I figured I'd take it to the almighty LJ.

I'm considering cutting my hair again, like back to what I had at the beginning of the year (yes, the spikeys~). I would like people's opinions. Should I leave it? Or cut it again?

(I would do a poll, but I'm so lame that I can't make it work. W/e...)

In place of someone you love...

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 01:46:46 GMT

I haven't posted a rant-ish thing for a while, I think.... So blah... :P Here's something that I did.

Good news:
-I've made a discovery today. It's not majorly epic, but it still something I will remember:
No matter how down you feel, or tired, just hugging someone for minutes on end, feels so good. I hugged Emily for a while after school, and it's was.... Relaxing? Lol, she enjoyed the hug too. So if you're feeling "off" or what-not, hug someone for a long time. It's so much better than the quick hug.
-Trimester 2 is almost done! YUSSS, no more push-ups or +20 minute runs.
-Lunch with David tomorrow, Yay! (And Tina and Emily of course, I LOVE having lunch with you guys~)
-I learned how to play chess.
-I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE my friends. :D Kudos to you guys!!

Bad News:
-I have Creeper McCreeper for class tomorrow (AKA: Mr. Wardell). If he gets within 4 inches of my face again, I'll smack him. (He seems to do that a lot lately). Katie's lucky, getting Micah to ask all the questions for her. I doubt Wardell will get so close to Micah, as he does to girls.
-I need to pull up three Cs... Those classes suck, where you have very little in the grade book, and what you do have in there are tests, that could have been bombed.
-I suck at chess.
-I had an ortho appointment. Waiting to get in was longer than the actual appointment.

Fun Bit of the Day: http://robbuz.deviantart.com/art/Google-113347441

Mad as Rabbits

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 02:30:11 GMT

Everything seems really stupid, and people really suck (non-friends ones, of course, aren't included in this). All they like to do is boast about how great they are, and/or point out how many flaws you seem to have.

We're all human, we have flaws. They should just get the fuck over it.
Also, I'm just tired of everything. Nothing seems to get better, and I can't just say "I'm having so much bad luck", because that's really a terrible excuse (I'm still using it though *shoots self*), but the odds of everything don't seem to be in my favor.

Also, the girls I sit next to in German are being kinda snotty and ignorant lately (except themselves). It makes me sad, which concerns Frau Tischer (damn that front row!)... Melissa Lund said hi to me after school though....

Welcome to being a teenager, the most terrible experience in the world.

RAAWWWRRRJIFCHEIOHDWKL

Fri, 02 Jan 2009 17:38:42 GMT

I'm so frustrated with my dad. >:( So this is my rant of the last few minutes.
I am cleaning the house(voluntarily, of course, and am enjoying it), but at the moment, I'm power-cleaning the kitchen. We had some stuff that needed to be thrown into the recycling, so I asked my dad if he could help me bring in the garbage can and recycling bin. His response was, "I need to finish this video and take a bath, then I'll help you with that." Mind this, his baths are generally an hour or longer. I'm almost done with the kitchen, and throwing that stuff into recycling would be one of the finishing steps, so I don't want to have to wait over an hour just for his help. He gets all angry at me for not being patient or something like that, because I did it all myself.... My main thing about this is that he's getting mad at me, but I'm cleaning the house for him, so he doesn't need to lift a finger otherwise.(His family is coming over tomorrow, so it needs to be super clean).

Also, he says screamo music isn't real music. He says it hurts his ears, and he can't understand what they're saying. Also, he says it's just talking, and that's the main reason for it not being "real music". Then what the fuck about his rap???? RAP!!>:!#EWKONHDW GOD! I just want to blow up so much right now!!! I'm normally upset that he's not home very often, but when he is home, he gets on my nerves so much!!!

Done. Sorry.

Excited

Sun, 28 Dec 2008 17:16:20 GMT

I'm so excited for sledding!!! <3 Though I'm worried I'm gonna get lost on the way to Allison's house or something, lol.
I'm not sure how many people will read this, but I was thinking... Should I bring my camera and take some pictures/video? I kinda want to, because it sounds like it's a good group that's going, and it'll be a lot of fun. :D I guess I just wanted someone else's opinion on it... And of course, I'll post the stuff to LJ later. :3
SO EXCITED AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!
I hope all of you are having a good day!!!!~~@!

Hi-Ho, drugged up cats

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 22:07:03 GMT

Just thought you guys might be interested in seeing cats hit the 'nip.... They can get pretty crazy... (And YES, that IS Pepper's tongue sticking out!)

On other notes, I'm still not feeling well, but I'm gonna try my hardest to go back to school tomorrow, sick or not. >.<